Dear Hester: How do I tell my family that I seem to have become a nudist?

Dear Hester: How do I tell my family that I seem to have become a nudist?

Not long after I moved in with Corey he told me that he wanted to be naked most of the time we’re together. I wasn’t really shocked by that, since we’re used to seeing each other naked. But I didn’t actually know nudity was so important to him. He doesn’t call himself a “nudist” or “naturist”, but I didn’t know until then that he’d wanted for some time to stop wearing clothes as much as possible.

My first experience being openly naked outside where I lived was when we went on hiking and camping trips where we’re both naked most of the time. I was OK with that as long as it was somewhere we were very unlikely to be seen. Then we started going to a nude beach. At first, I was very hesitant about getting naked at the beach, but I gradually got fairly used to it. It kind of surprised me to find how natural being naked in situations like that started to feel.

Corey by then, of course, was naked most of the time in our apartment, and I often didn’t wear anything either as long as it was just the two of us. For a while, I drew the line at being naked in the apartment when neighbors or friends were present. I was surprised how soon none of those people seemed to mind that Corey was naked, and just accepted that was normal for him. So eventually I gave in and started wearing little or nothing myself – and found I enjoyed that almost as much as Corey did!

So I cautiously started being naked when we went to visit friends of his. They had no problem with our nudity, because they knew it’s what Corey enjoyed. I even let Corey talk me into leaving the apartment as naked as he was on visits like that. Fortunately, most others living near us were used to our nudity by then. And our parking space wasn’t visible from the street.

Before long I got up the courage to visit my own friends or go to some parties naked with Corey. And most everyone thought that was OK. I guess we’re lucky to have such tolerant friends. Some even praised my “bravery” or said they admired my apparent lack of fear about being naked. But what surprised me the most was that I started looking forward to socializing naked!

My big problem now is that my parents know my relationship with Corey has become pretty serious. I’ve described him to them in very positive terms. So they’re eager for us to visit in order to meet him. We live pretty far away from my parents and any other relatives, so none of them have any idea that both Corey and I are so enthusiastic about nudity. Although my parents aren’t religious people, they live in a conservative part of the country, and they might be quite upset that their only daughter has become an avid nudist.

What should I do?


Dear Kayden:

Clearly, you and Corey are enjoying your nudist lifestyle. So you should definitely find a way to let your parents know this if your relationship with them is important.

I know little about nudism myself, but I don’t believe there’s anything “wrong” or “immoral” about it. I do know some people who’re nudists, and they seem to be fine people. I try not to be judgmental about things before I become better informed. If your parents feel the same way, there shouldn’t be major problems. However, I know much less about your family than you do.

The first thing you should do is try to find out as much as you can about your parents’ opinions regarding nudism. Perhaps you could find some reason to bring up nudism in a general way. For instance, you could say you’ve read an interesting article about nudism and wonder what your parents think of it. Or you could say you have a friend who’s interested in nudism and wonder whether to worry about that.

Hopefully, you’ll find your parents don’t have serious reservations about nudism, or don’t feel they know enough about it to form a definite opinion. Then you could mention that you and Corey have enjoyed hiking or camping trips where you were both naked at times. As long as you continue revealing more about the role of nudity in your relationship and you don’t encounter serious objections, the chances are good they’ll accept your interest in nudism.

But what if either or both of your parents seem to disapprove? At that point, you’ll have to decide whether to make a strong positive case for nudism if you think they’ll eventually accept your preference in spite of their reservations. If that doesn’t seem likely to work, you may need to just agree to disagree and say you hope they’ll be more accepting someday. Then maybe you can identify others in your family or mutual friends of you and your parents who might support your interest in nudism.

Just keep this in mind: you’re an adult. Even if your parents resist generally approving, you have every right to choose that lifestyle. Apparently, your parents have accepted your and Corey’s relationship. So I think the chances are good they’ll also accept your enthusiasm for nudism – even if they don’t fully understand your reasons.

Good luck!


6 thoughts on “Dear Hester: How do I tell my family that I seem to have become a nudist?”

  1. Hi Kayden
    Your willingness to give your partner’s approach to a naked life is commendable. I have spent most of my life, if not all, preferring to be without clothes. This has become increasingly easier over the decades and with different partners due to greater understanding and acceptance of nudity as well as clarification and changes in law. Being naked in public, WNBR and naked hiking, has become easier but, unlike you, I am not yet confident or courageous enough to leave the house and visit friends in the nude! The nearest I’ve got to living without clothes is on holiday at naturist resorts like Ile du Levant or at my naturist campsite. There have been times when I feel like casting caution to the wind and just going for it. That being said there is security in numbers snd the more people like you and your partner who live and move about naturally, the more people will be able to experience the honesty, freedom and absolute joy of being generally unencumbered with unnecessary clothing. Go for it and best of luck

    1. Rich,

      As we go through life, the range of what is possible for us may either expand or contract. A very large amount depends on our social environment – our family, our friends, where we live, and where we work. Different environments affect our ability to enjoy naturism in very different ways.

      The characters in this post are fictional, and they clearly inhabit a fairly tolerant environment. But they (and we) don’t necessarily know what our current environment is actually like as far as naturism is concerned. “Kayden” probably assumed that her environment was unaccepting of naturism, because that seems to be the case on the largest scale, as in a country like the U. S. But her relationship with “Corey” has let her realize that the social environment close to her is more tolerant and open-minded.

      If one’s actual social environment is more intolerant and narrow-minded than “Kayden’s”, the only alternatives are to seek a better environment, or wait and hope the current environment improves. The courage actually required may be what is enough to find a better environment, and not what is required to cope with the existing environment. The necessary decisions may be difficult, and for any particular person all depends on their range of feasible options.

  2. Dear Kayden

    We agree with Hester 100%. That approach should help you.
    Above all be honest and sincere about your interest and commitment to nudism as being wholesome, healthy and makes you happy.


      1. Congratulations, on the number of followers on twitter and I like the Naturistplace life but I don’t practice it myself because I was to give up it when my mom caught on. I love to meet women who love the naturist lifestyle. I hope to date a woman who isn’t shy to be naked with me and herself.

        1. Saul,
          If you’re not currently living by yourself, you’ll need to have the approval of others you live with to practice naturism at home. There are few unattached women at naturist clubs or clothing-optional beaches. So you’ll probably have to discuss naturism with women you date who aren’t naturists but are open-minded enough to consider it. If possible, find naturist men who can be friends, because they may be able to give you helpful advice. Perhaps there aren’t a lot of naturists where you are now living, so moving where there are more naturists may help. Sometimes life doesn’t offer us simple ways to accomplish what we want.

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